Halloween is past us and the hard part is ahead of us

Halloween is JC's favorite Holiday. I've learned to love it over the years we've been together. I wouldn't say it's my favorite holiday but it is definitely my favorite time of the year. I love decorating for fall and the weather changing. JC and I always take the last week of October off of work and stay at home and watch all the Friday the 13th movies and the Halloween movies...and whatever other scary movies that we can find to watch. I of course don't have a job this October so I didn't have to worry about taking work off...but JC did. He had asked for it off back in February and he had been talking about since last October how we were gonna do this every year and he was so excited about everything we were going to do. Little did we know that on the first day of his vacation, Saturday October 25, that he would lose one of his best friends.

We play in a fall softball league and we had our league tournaments that started on Saturday. JC and I showed up early because that's just how JC is..hehe.. and when we pulled up i remember seeing Q'Ball standing there in his red hoodie trying to stay warm when the temp was 36 degrees.... The ball diamond is at an old school that they use for a community center now. So Q'Ball, JC, & I went into the gymnasium and hung up for about 30-45 minutes until it was time for our game to start... I'd tell ya all the special memories I have with Q'Ball that day but they wouldn't be special if I shared them to the world...so i'll keep them to myself. But one that is important to me is after one of our games Q'Ball and I were the first ones to walk back to the picnic area where are team would sit until our next game...and I forget how but we got on the subject but I had mentioned that one day if we ever won the lottery or came into a lot of money that he wanted to build a four-diamond softball complex in our area...and he would run it and umpire it..and i could work in the office. O'Ball told me that he had the same dream.. he wanted to do the same thing but that he wanted JC to run it because he knew he'd be the best at it. I know Q'Ball and JC thought a lot of each other. They were good friends but yet they had a relationship that I had never seen JC have with a friend. They understood each other on a different level. Q'ball was a very spiritual person and JC respected that and I think learned alot from him. At the same time they were exactly alike. JC was the most conceited, the most competitive, the mouthiest person i knew (all in a good way) until I met Q'Ball. I first met Q'ball about 2 years ago at Spencer Park in Terre Haute, Indiana. They played on opposite teams but worked together everyday. So of course there was a lot of "shit talking" all day long at work...and then when we'd show up at the diamond..the minute we got out of the car I could hear Q'ball's mouth just a going...haha and the more I was around him and got to know him I thought wow... I always thought JC was the most competitive person...haha they were so much alike.. I liked it though...and so did JC. I don't think he had met anyone that was so much like him. Someone that could throw it right back at him just like he gave it. It was so fun to listen and watch them go at each other.. it was all fun in games but my favorite part was when Q'ball could actually say something and it would either make JC speechless or it would take him a second to give a comeback. haha I obviously love the way my husband acts...but i would hate when he would mouth me and i couldn't come up with a comeback..hehe so I loved it when JC was put in his place. lol because if I couldn't do it....I loved that Q'ball could.

Now...he's gone. I only knew him for almost 2 years....and we had only become good friends the past 6 months or so... JC knew him since his first day at work...JC is the one that gave him his nickname, Q'Ball, and it was JC who talked to him everyday and played ball with him sometimes 3 times a week and then on the weekend. It's hard for me to lose a friend, but its even harder for me to see my husband hurting.

Sunday was hard because Q'ball was supposed to be there with us helping us win and making it to the championship. Everywhere I walked at the ball diamond I saw something that reminded me of him from the day before or somewhere where he and I had sat and talked the day before. It was so hard to be there and he wasn't there. He usually batted behind me in the batting order so every time I would get up to bat...I would look over and he wasn't there. Or when I'd get on base...usually he's up next so I would cheer him on to hit me in.... but i couldn't because he wasn't there. When we'd be out in the field and someone would get up to bat that always hits it to left/left center I would usually yell "Be ready Q'ball!" But I couldn't because there was someone else there.... Wednesday and Thursday was the showing and Funeral and that was hard for both of us. But I think with him being on vacation this week he still doesn't quite "feel it." I mean he was on vacation so he wouldn't have seen Q'Ball any this week anyways. Softball was over and we would have got phone calls him calling and just chatting but he wouldn't have seen him at all. So to him I think it's not really real yet. Next week he'll be back at work and Q'Ball won't be next to him on his line, he won't be on break with him, he won't be at his lunch table... So for me the hard stuff is over. Softball is over until next year and though the rest of the football season will be hard because I'll be waiting for his call after every eagles and cowboy games... the hard part for me is over... Now its just time to heel and be there for my husband because his hard part is just starting. He has to go back to work and see everyday that his best friend isn't there with him.

So this year his vacation wasn't exactly what he wanted it to be. But we were married this vacation and our love is stronger than ever. We still watched some of our favorite scary movies and we still carved pumpkins and we went to a haunted house...we just did it with someone on our mind. Someone that I will never forget as long as I live. Someone who made me think about things that I hadn't thought about for a long time or hadn't ever thought about. Back in August after Q'ball and his wife had been separated for a few months and he was ready to move on I started thinking about trying to set Q'ball up with one of my friends... On October 11, 2008 I introduced him to my friend Kari. He thought she was so beautiful and he really wanted a relationship with her. He wanted to introduce her to his faith and his kids and spend time with her. I won't ever know if she was ever planning on leaving her boyfriend (who doesn't deserve her) and gonna try it with Q'ball or if it would have even worked out. But I do know for that two weeks that talked I was so happy for him and her. I knew that the rest of our lives were gonna be so much fun. I knew that us four (JC, me, Kari, Q'ball) were gonna be great friends..doing stuff together and having kids together and living by each other (just like Kari and i had planned a long time ago). I know Q'ball was so happy and Kari loved having someone treat her like she was special. Their time got cut short and never went any farther then talking on the phone and texting but I know the idea of having a great guy Kari loved....and the idea of being happy again after a bad marriage Q'ball loved.And I loved that I was gonna make two good friends of mine be happy together and JC and I would be there to witness it all.

It's just so crazy how something can happen so fast....and things can change in a blink of an eye.

**the first two pictures are of JC's Halloween (the movie) pumpkin and the last two pictures are of my Scooby Doo pumpkin.**